Steroids are a helluva drug. The Paul brothers are fucking amazing. I said that. Twice now. But it really is true. These two guys are absolute meatheads, but you know what? David Paul and Peter Paul are amazingly talented, and their movies hold up over time. This post contains three of their movies from YouTube. The whole movies, for free.
I am not being too effusive, I feel. I watch way more bad movies than good. I’m your typical Gen X nut-ball bad-movie enthusiast, ala MST3K. And we (our movie group) began watching the Paul Bros. movies upon request. We figured they’d serve up the same sort of steaming, feces-encrusted Hollywood barf that we’ve come to love. We expected something like Rappin‘. Like Saturn 3. Like Hellraiser VII. Like House at the Edge of the Park. Check out “Double Trouble:”
Instead, we got absolute gems. Similar to what happened when we watched The Howling 3. (By the way, the Howling 3 is fucking incredible. Yes, it is a were-movie. You have NO idea, though… Just watch it now.) I swear, all of these twins’ movies are fun and watchable. Barbarians is the least of their works, as they really only start talking about halfway through the movie, and up to then, it’s a Conan clone. It’s a Conan clone after that too, but at least the Paul Brothers have lines.
And that’s the thing, you see these muscle nuts, and you think “Gee, I bet they can barely speak, I hope they don’t have a lot of lines, and spend most of their time on screen fucking up bad guys.”
But then they speak! And, here’s the thing… they are self deprecating, and they actually have pretty good comedic timing! They, literally, are no worse at their jobs than a Schwarzenegger or a Stallone. Better, in fact. They are funny! Take Double Trouble, or Twin Sitters. Like, Mannequin funny. Seriously, these movies are on par with the worst of the best movies from their day. Imagine a movie that float just about the bad movie line. Like, a perfect 5, maybe a 5.5 out of 10. Like, way better than Hulk Hogan movies funny. Here’s “Twin Sitters.”
That’s these bros. movies! They are actually watchable! Incredible! Perhaps the greatest miracle of our age! And you know why? Because most of the humor in their movies is self-deprecating. It’s about how stupid they are, how much they are meat heads. How much they don’t understand and don’t say words properly. It’s, frankly, the same reason Jack Benny holds up after almost 100 years…. They don’t punch down. They punch themselves. And that’s always funny.
Check out “Think Big.” It’s stupid joy. And the intro rap is better than any rap in Rappin’. And it’s the Paul Twins rapping….